Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Mom Knows Best

My mom always said I should be a writer. She said it to me countless times during high school and college. I'd always roll my eyes, but I admit I was secretly flattered. As I am writing this, I just realized that the last thing I actually sat down and wrote, besides elementary school projects, was her eulogy 9 years ago. She died very suddenly of a brain hemorrhage, and we were all shocked and heartbroken. I was a new mom, and since I always looked for the silver lining, I felt blessed that she had at least been with me to get me through my first year of motherhood. Anyway, I very carefully crafted her eulogy, as it was monumentally important to me that I express everything I felt for her, and it was a way of giving a final thanks to her for everything she had given to me. The church we booked was so full that people had to stand out front on the lawn and listen to the service piped through the loudspeaker. It was overwhelming to me how many peoples' lives she touched.

Like I said, it's been 9 years that she's been gone. Now I have 3 kids and just hit the big 4-0 last year. My youngest is getting ready to start kindergarden, so now I have been feeling the angst of "what I am supposed to do now?" I am a stay at home mom, and want to continue to be, as it's important to me to be home with my kids if I can.


My mom seemed to be right about almost everything, especially about those very basic and most important things. She knew which friends and boyfriends weren't good for me. Countless times, she told me, "He's gonna break your heart." She was always right! When she met my husband, even though on the surface I didn't think they would really mesh, she said she felt like she'd known him forever. That's a pretty rousing endorsement, in my book. So... maybe she was right about the writing thing. I guess I'll never know unless I try, so here we go.